🦬 The Golden-Haired Woman

In Wild at Heart, the classic book about reclaiming your masculinity (and what that looks like through a Christian lens), author John Eldredge warns men to beware of the mythical “Golden-Haired Woman.”

You see, the Golden-Haired Woman is perfect. She has no flaws. She is ther yin to your yang. She’s going to solve alllll of your life’s problems and then some.

But that’s bull.

She doesn’t exist and here are 3 traps that she lures men into…

Trap #1: She lures you into pornography.

Yeah, I said the “P” word. Did that make you uncomfortable?

Good.

Men watching pornography is the result of a failed search for the Golden-Haired woman.

People are people. Plain and simple. We’re all flawed. We’re all broken. We all have sooomething wrong with us.

But you already knew that. So why are you looking for this woman that is the exception to that? And worse yet, what happens when you don’t find her?

For many men, they fall into a fabricated reality. They subconsciously tell themselves, “I can’t find her in real life, but I found her online in a 12-minute video on some website with an x in the name.”

Stop it.

You’re trying to take the princess without slaying the dragon. You haven’t earned her, and if your expectations of a woman are… well… impossible, then you might fall into this trap.

Trap #2: She lures you into “shiny object syndrome.”

Have you ever seen a young man with a solid relationship until… he sees “the new girl” across the room? He doesn’t know anything about her, but for some reason he’s just instantly convinced that “She’s the one” and throws away everything he has for her.

And then what happens…?

Six months later he’s lonely and confused why his Golden-Haired Woman wasn’t who she appeared to be.

Or rather… who he expected her to be.

You will not find fulfillment by chasing the next thing… and then the next thing… and then the next thing… especially when it comes to women.

Your peace; your fulfillment; your contentment; they come from within.

Trap #3: She convinces you that she can make you a man.

A good woman is a trampoline, not a rocket ship. She’s going to help you jump higher, but she’s not going to fly you to the moon while you just sit there and click some buttons.

(Pretty good analogy, right?)

Every man has to find himself.

She can’t find you for you. You have to find you.

And that’s my challenge for you…

Go find yourself this week. Go lose yourself.

No, I’m not joking; go searching.

Go for a hike alone. Go to dinner by yourself (no, it doesn’t count if you’re on your phone the whole time). Go spend time with yourself.

You self-confidence will act like a magnet, and while you may not find the allusive Golden-Haired Woman, you just might find yourself.

By the way…

If you haven’t yet, you should go subscribe to my Youtube channel! I put out a bunch of content like this - all geared toward helping you become the man you were born to be.